Not Funny: The Love Guru’s Trailer

Trailer Watch

The trailer for Michael Myers’ The Love Guru arrived in the mail today, and got some heavy rotation as well this past weekend on the small screen, if not before — though it doesn’t yet seem to be online*, if such a thing is possible these days. I watched it three times — twice in TiVo-captured form, once again on messengered DVD, to make sure I wasn’t missing anything — and nope, I didn’t laugh once.

The film, due June 20 from Paramount — or about the time Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull will be milking its last reasonably expected repeat business from wallets — stars Myers in his first new original character since Austin Powers, as “the second best guru in India,” Pitka. An American who was left at the gates of an ashram in India as a child (shades of Joe Dirt, anyone?) and raised by religious types, Pitka moves back to the United States to seek fame and fortune in the world of spirituality-infused self-help. His unorthodox methods are put to the test when he’s hired to settle a rift between a star hockey player on the Toronto Maple Leafs (Romany Malco) and his estranged wife (Meagan Good). The movie costars Jessica Alba, Verne Troyer and Justin Timberlake, alongside the aforementioned Malco and Good.

Sigh… where to begin? First off, any comedy relying on ice hockey is just a dicey proposition; Americans do not care about the sport, outside of about five cities (maybe fewer). And I thought Oliver Stone’s Any Given Sunday had reliably exhausted the idea of a hot, young female sports franchise owner (Cameron Diaz there, Alba here, with Troyer as the coach). The story here seems tired, implausible and uninteresting (hat trick!), seemingly leaving us with just lots of winking from Myers.

In more specifics, the “ding!” sound effect accompanying Myers’ twinkly moustache curl (used twice) seems lazily nipped from television (a “Debbie Downer” sketch, perhaps?), Alba’s delivery of the already very predictable, “Well, this one time in college…” line is dreadful, and the incongruous use of Beyonce’s “Crazy in Love” feels like a munificent lender from a waiver signed on the set of the third Austin Powers. Timberlake — who plays Good’s new suitor, and a fellow hockey player — is the high point of the piece (with his line, “You know, like in the porno?”), but even he only brought a half-smile to my face, not a laugh. Honestly, the first thought I had upon seeing the trailer for The Love Guru was, “Hmmm… I’d rather watch 2002’s The Guru again, actually. That wasn’t a bad little movie — some fun Bollywood stuff, musical numbers, plus the advantage of Heather Graham and Marisa Tomei.”

* Update, 3/5: The trailer is now online, via the movie’s web site.

5 thoughts on “Not Funny: The Love Guru’s Trailer”

  1. If Mr. Meyer(s) is going to make the same movie over and over, then why dosen’t he just stick with the winner Wayne??

    but here’s a blog inspired idea for you:

    Hat Trick Hero!

    That would make an awesome movie. Get Rogen to make a cameo and Apatow to produce — about some hap(s)less guys who sneak out of high school to go play video games at the local arcade. I’d laugh at THAT trailer.

  2. I agree; the premise is entirely the problem:

    a) It’s very weak, from top to Alba’s bottom.

    b) It’s not based on any obvious pop culture reference point (maybe Peter Sellers’ The Party, in a pinch);

    c) And in terms of dramatic tension, oh gee, professional athletes… cheating!? And even if they are forced to face up to it, chances are they go for a $4 million ring, not some hairy Hindu.

  4. I’ll get to work on storyboards… as long as we can have the lead can be named Brent. Maybe even have two Brents??

  5. This trailer makes me want to punch Myers in the face. Or maybe it’s actually his FACe that makes me want to do that, i don’t know.

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