Sex farce and wriggling softcore T&A showcase meets foreign-shore political satire in SSI: Sex Squad Investigation, the latest spoof from the EI Cinema folks, who’ve made a nice cottage industry out of lampooning — in often sapphic fashion — recent film and TV hits as well as genre moviemaking in general.
Written by Andy Sawyer and directed by Thomas J. Moose (Zombie Toxin, The Girl Who Shagged Me), SSI is a wobbly-legged thing, done in by the fact that none of its makers seem to really be on the same page. Detective John Honeysuckle (John Fedele) is a troubled cop struggling in his duties as the top dog in the city’s toughest criminal investigation unit. Set up to enforce President George Shrub’s “Illicit Sex Bill,” which has made premarital sexual intercourse punishable by life behind bars, the SSI unit is a mess. With unsolved cases mounting, sexy rookie Katrina Lightbody (AJ Khan) arrives as Honeysuckle’s new partner.
When, as the DVD’s back cover text explains, a “highly profitable crime spree of illegal inhibitions and seductions” hits New York City, Honeysuckle must put aside his differences and work together with Lightbody. As the serial seducer continues her haughty onslaught, though, dirty secrets involving the president (Frank Bowdler) and his promiscuous daughter Jessica (porn star Natalie Heck) come out. Vice President Selina Moon (McKenzie Matthews) eventually reveals herself as someone not to be trusted… after, of course, blouses are doffed and skirts dropped.
I’m generally all for judging a movie on its own terms, within the genre parameters it uses to define itself, if it all. But simply putting whimsical goofball shenanigans and play-acted indulgences to film (or video, as the case may be) doesn’t a “satire” make. Such behavior has a shelf life and appreciatory audience that doesn’t much extend beyond high school English class group projects, and the friends involved in such rib-nudging, look-at-me nuttiness. That pretty much defines all the non-nude portions of SSI. Fedele is a world-class mugger, which serves some spoof work well, but here undercuts everything. This is a low-rent yawner, through and through. There are much easier ways to see naked women, really. Also, for reasons not entirely clear, the movie is shot in the United
Kingdom but set Stateside, which makes for all sort of cross-cultural
bunglings.
Housed in a regular Amray case, SSI is presented in 1.78:1 widescreen, enhanced for 16×9 televisions. Three minutes of bloopers are set to tune that very much owes a debt to Kenny Loggins’ “Danger Zone,” and there’s also included a 31-minute short from 1992, The FBI Guys, that costars Fedele and apparently played at the Meadowland Showcase, according to a rambling commentary of reminiscence tagged on as well. Crap stew with an extra side serving of feces cornbread, you say? You bet. To purchase the movie via Amazon, click here. For more general information, meanwhile, visit Pop Cinema’s web site by clicking here. F (Movie) C- (Disc)