I got an email from a friend that pointed out first we had President Obama's half-eaten pancakes and eggs up put for Internet auction. Then we had Shia LaBeouf's tracked-up and sweat-grungy bikini briefs from a studio's wardrobe department, followed by Scarlett Johansson's used Kleenex from The Tonight Show. And now bids will be taken on Michael Jackson's queen-size, hospital-adjustable death bed from his Bel-Air compound. Asked what this says about civilization, I have but one reply: clearly I should start selling "bottled air" from junkets and other interview opportunities.