Co-directed by Meema Spadola and Thom Powers, 1994’s Breasts: A Documentary and its companion piece Private Dicks: Men Exposed examine in sometimes humorous but always humanizing fashion what women and men think about their own sexual running gear. Chatty and straightforward, both films feature abundant nudity of the titular items, and insights into both what their owners think about them and how they frequently impact not only one’s self-esteem but even the general sense of interaction with members of the opposite and/or preferred sex.
Betty Boop and Jessica Rabbit being her ideal role models, while a disconsolate teacher in her early 20s performs the dreaded “pencil test,” stowing a sharpened No. 2 under her sagging mammaries. Adolescent recollections both traumatic and wistful are trotted out, and a mother and daughter — the latter having had breast reduction surgery — together provide interesting familial observations. Other quick, shorthand impressions? Silicone = blech!
Men spend a lot of time thinking about their penises and even, as the saying goes, with their penises, so Private Dicks: Men Exposed was a logical follow-up for Spadola and Powers, though one that they admit in bonus interview material they tackled somewhat hesitantly. It turns out that their fears of masculine bravado and lack of candor were unfounded, as Private Dicks is actually the more revelatory and interesting of the two movies, perhaps because of its lack of competition, per se. The winking difference in titles is telling — and on the one hand even somewhat irksome — but its defusing impact is undeniable. In wide-ranging interviews with everyone from high school and college students to a paraplegic to well-endowed but equally articulate porn star Lexington Steele (who casually argues that size does matter, because what women purchases the four-inch dildo?), Private Dicks touches on every conceivable topic related to the penis, from sexually transmitted disease and alteration (“There’s something untrustworthy about the uncircumcised penis,” offers one subject, only half-jokingly) to masturbation and the loss of virginity. Loquacious and overly pedantic explications with slang dictionary expert Jesse Sheidlower become tiresome, but the men here generally open up in illuminating fashion about how their penis affects and informs their relationships.
Each running under an hour in length, both films are presented in full screen, and suffer somewhat from poor video quality and haphazardly produced or inserted stock footage. As sociological documents, however, they triumph over their limited production means and unimaginative presentation. Private Dicks: Men Exposed includes an interview with the filmmakers, a photo gallery and another interview with professional hoax perpetrator Alan Abel, who appears in the movie under an assumed name, claiming to have an erect member under two inches in length. (Though topless, he’s one of the few subjects who keep their pants on.) Breasts: A Documentary, meanwhile, includes more bonus footage, with filmmaker interviews, biographies and trailers and a full half hour of additional interview material. B (Movies) B- (Discs)
